Never Forget The Importance of Style

8. Good morning sunshine

A determined hand stripped the window open and bare, and together with disgustingly bright sunshine a breeze of cool, fresh air flowed into the so far quiet and dimly lit bedroom.

"Up with the sails! Brand new day's come! Cheerio!"

"To hell with you," growled an irate voice from somewhere safely under several pillows and a duvet. "Can't you bloody fool see that I'm sleeping? You've got no heart, coming here as quietly and gently as a brass band on parade and cruelly disturbing my sweetest sleep in the middle of the night!"

"The night's gone already," Merdos declared cheerfully and slapped the bundle of cloth that presumably contained his friend, judging from the fact that the voice had come from somewhere inside it. The slap immediately brought about a sulky groan but nothing else. Merdos settled down into an armchair, opened a bottle of brandy he'd snatched from the adjoining room, and helped himself to a drink.

"If it's morning, keep your hands off of my brandy," the bundle commented, somehow aware of the goings-on even though no visible eye or other sensing organ could be detected. "Don't you know it's not good manners to drink brandy before two o'clock?"

"It's half past," Merdos happily retorted and poured half of the liquor into his throat. "Excellent brandy, by the way."

"Half past two? Can't be," the bundle objected sounding rather suspicious. "I just got to bed a moment ago."

"No you didn't." Merdos shook his head to accentuate his words; the bundle had already demonstrated rather surprising sensory abilities, so there was no reason to assume that it couldn't observe his body language as well. "Your servant told me that you arrived around four o'clock this morning, undressed, drank a cup of tea, said that you were going to take a nap, and have slept like a log ever since."

"Oh," said the bundle, obviously satisfied with the explanation.

"On my way here," Merdos said pouring himself a second glass, "and could you please show something of yourself, I'd feel less silly if this didn't look like I'm talking to a bloody heap of bedlinen... oh thank you," he sighed as Leone's left foot appeared and waved at him. "Yes, on my way here I walked straight into the greatest scandal of this month."

"Good god!" Leone's ruffled head popped up, then he squeezed his eyes tightly shut with a moan and plunged back to peer at Merdos from the darkness. "Is my last night already on everybody's lips?"

"You were not mentioned, you egoistic pig," Merdos sneered.

"You torment me," Leone whined from his hiding place. "What's the scandal? I'm dying to hear. Who did you see, and doing what?"

"Not see but hear." Merdos paused for dramatic effect. "The Queen of Spades and Lady Lettuce."

"I can guess already. Someone has torn a foot of lace from her dress on a bush, quite accidentally while cutting roses of course, and now everybody agrees it's clear evidence of her affair with her gardener." Leone nodded, obviously satisfied with his deduction, but Merdos laughed.

"No, stupid you! This was something more."

"It's not the gardener?"

"No. The young miss Mayor has lost her diamond brooch."

"Ooh," said Leone and yawned so that his jaws nearly cracked. "Not again... They really shouldn't give her anything of any value, not for a second. She keeps sowing them around, in all places imaginable. I suppose she actually believes that they'll begin sprouting new ones, given enough time?"

"Well, yes," Merdos admitted; said young lady was indeed notorious for her forgetfulness. "But so far it's been only relatively cheap things. This is different, though. It's the brooch she wore the day before yesterday, remember? The big one with diamonds."

"Oh, that - it was terribly ugly, and didn't suit her at all." Leone wiggled enough out of the duvet to flex his arms languorously. "I felt very awkward when she asked how I liked it. I told her it was incredible."

"Hmm." Merdos sipped the last of the brandy and eyed the bottle speculatively. "They say she's absolutely broken."

"I'm not surprised. It must have been expensive. Besides, I guess she liked it. She's exactly the type that likes ugly jewels."

"Apparently she lost it there that night." Merdos helped himself to yet another drink. "They believe she dropped it somewhere in the ballroom bushes, and that it may have been carried out with all those decorations. So far nothing's been found, though."

"A tedious job," Leone commiserated. "There were tons of decorations... I wouldn't want to be there, combing through all that trash just to find one lousy diamond brooch."

"Neither would I," Merdos nodded. "But at least you know now the scandal of the month."

"I was already sort of expecting it."

"Yeah, it's about time now." Then Merdos cocked his head, eyes glittering with curiosity. "By the way, what were you doing till four o'clock this morning?"

"Playing billiards at Hari's - with Hari and Goldie," Leone muttered and disappeared again.

"With - no you were not!" Merdos sprang on him and began throwing the duvets and pillows all around. "You're kidding, you goddamn bastard, you son of a bitch - with Goldie? I'll kill you!"

"Take it easy," Leone panted from the corner of the large bed where he had retreated under the assault. "I was indeed, but only and expressly just playing billiards, nothing more. The reason why we stayed there for the whole night was that Goldie wanted to show us some of his special hits. The kid has to be seen to be believed. He says he's practiced secretly on his honorable papa's table, and that sure shows in his playing."

"You swear you did only that?" Merdos still did not seem fully convinced.

"I swear. I didn't touch him with my little finger," Leone replied truthfully. "But now, would you come with me, one of these days, to Hari's for some billiards? With me, and Hari, and Goldie?"

"Any time."

"Somehow I knew you'd say so... well," Leone smiled to him, luxuriously stretching his slim body, "how about tonight then? Goldie's parents are out of town. He's definitely coming."

"Gods. I'll be dead."

"That's definitely not the way to achieve anything, my friend. Try this instead." Leone fished a small bottle from the top drawer of his nightstand and threw it to him. Merdos examined it, frowning.

"What's this?"

"My new cologne. Except that I told him it's yours and that you kindly let me borrow it as I had to shave before leaving your place yesterday morning. Lots of blue reed and musk. Goldie never stopped sniffing at me. Said it smells excessively sexy and on-turning."

Merdos carefully put the bottle into his pocket and rose from the chair.

"I'll be off," he said. "I'll pick you up at eight."

Leone waggled his fingers to his friend who exited, then wheeled around and frowned at him. "Leone," Merdos said in a dangerous tone, "exactly what did you tell Goldie? About the cologne?"

"Huh?" Leone blinked innocently. "I told you - that I'd borrowed it from you since I shaved at your place yesterday morning..."

"And why would you stay the night at my place?" Merdos put hands on his hips and scowled deeper. "Do you think you've improved my chances with the kid by letting him think that you might've slept with me?"

"Merdos..." Leone leaned back against the pillows and smirked. "For one thing, I let him understand that we fell asleep after a few drinks... And besides, I can't imagine how praising references about your prowess could damage your - outch!"

"Sometimes I really don't understand how I can stand you," Merdos stated loftily after pelting Leone on the head with a pillow. "Be ready at eight."

"Yes, baby..."

When the door closed after the dark man, Leone wiggled on the bed and yawned again. Then he reached for the bell.

Torell appeared in a whiff carrying a ready tray. Leone raised an eyebrow at him, but the servant merely smiled and placed the tray on his lap.

"When Mister Merdos arrived, I knew you'd soon be requiring your breakfast, sir," Torell said calmly. "I made some extra tea."

"Excellent," Leone sighed, grabbed a china cup and gulped greedily from it. "By the way, did you already send it away?"

"Yes, sir. It's on its way to Reál as we speak." The servant busied himself with the bedclothes scattered on the floor, straightened the curtains into a more orderly arrangement, then turned to looked at Leone. "I trust you did not have any special instructions concerning its treatment, sir?"

"No. I would've given them to you beforehand, as usual." Leone caught a fried egg from the plate with his fork and shoved it into his mouth. "I don't want any memento of that one for myself. Too hideous to be remembered."

"Very well, sir. Do you require anything else now?"

"Yes, Torell - a bath, please. With lots of foam. And make it cool, I don't want to sleep the rest of the day away."

"Yes sir."

Torell disappeared quietly into the bathroom and Leone grinned to his bread roll. Having an own apartment definitely had benefits. He glanced at the bedside clock: about three in the afternoon. He still had five hours before the appointment with Merdos, before a night of billiards and another, even better entertainment - watching his friend in action. Observing Merdos in full seduction mode was far better than seeing a good play, he decided, even if today's intricate dance was bound to be somewhat spoiled by the fact that the quarry was a little too willing to be caught.