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Here you'll find
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Mount Robillard
8. A BreakthroughLancer stopped before entering Scott's room, out of habit more than anything else, activated the monitor screen and looked at the picture. That was not really necessary: it was already weeks since the clone had stopped flinching away from him, and by now he was also fully following the base's daily rhythm. That meant he was definitely awake and active at the moment, or as active as he could in the limited confines of his room.Scott had not left the room ever since his arrival, not that it really would've been an option anyway. Even if the rebels had thought it possible to let him out, he certainly wouldn't have come. He already tolerated Lancer rather well; the safety distance between them had dwindled steadily and by now Lancer could already sit on the same bed with him. But he still reacted adversely to the presence of anyone else, no matter how physically unthreatening they were. They had tried it, but every attempt had failed. No matter who joined them, Scott was very much on edge and not even Lancer's soothing presence made much of a difference. Lancer looked at the prone figure and sighed. He couldn't think of Scott as 'a clone' or 'the enemy' anymore. He was just Scott. Weird, strange, fascinating. In some ways very human, in others a total alien. However, Lancer had to admit to himself that he had recently been a little frustrated by the apparent lack of progress. At first everything had seemed so deceptively easy. Scott had practically soaked up information, asked billions of questions, devoured the videos Lancer had given him to watch: documents, instructional programs, educational material. Soap operas. Drama. He had adapted remarkably. He was fizzing with curiosity. And yet, somehow, for quite a while now things had been stalling. Yes, Scott was learning things, but they were not getting forward as he would have liked. Surely there had to be more to being a human than knowing loads of things? He shook his head and sighed again. Of course this was exactly what Rori had told him about several times: that things would most likely develop in leaps. It was normal that there might be rapid progress in a very short time, then a standstill or even regression, until everything was again ready for the next race onward. Rori kept reminding him that Scott needed time to process and organize all the new data he had been imbibing, that it was an extremely important phase, that it might look like nothing was happening even though nothing could be further from the truth. Yes, Lancer knew that. He also knew that he must be patient and not show his frustration in any way. But he was no professional, and the situation was getting sorely on his nerves! Inside the room, Scott sat up and looked imploringly at the clock. Lancer shook himself out of his contemplation. He was being eagerly expected, and it was really unfair to keep Scott waiting. He touched the call button to signal his arrival, started the recording, and opened the door. "Lancer!" Scott had jumped on his feet and his whole face lit up. "I was looking forward to seeing you! I have so many questions!" "That's great! So you're going to grill me again?" Lancer smiled fondly, walked to the bed and sat down on the other end pulling his legs under him. "What've you been watching this time? Surely not all of the videos I released for you?" "I have." Scott nodded vigorously and Lancer groaned in mock despair. Some time ago that would've still put Scott immediately on his guard. Now the clone just cocked his head, then decided that Lancer didn't really mean it, and flashed a relieved smile. "And there were so many things I did not understand." "Well well, you do look flustered!" Lancer tried to remember which titles he had given to Scott this time, too lazy to look at the monitor, and gave up guessing at the one that might have caused such a reaction. Scott sat down on the bed as well, nearly bouncing on the pillow. "OK, go ahead Scott. I'm ready!" "All right!" Scott took a deep breath and then stopped to think. "I do not know where to start, though." "Start somewhere," Lancer encouraged. "Ask the first question that comes to your mind, and we go on from there. Just as usual." "Very well... Lancer, how do you make love, and is it very painful?" Lancer stared at him and forgot to breathe for several seconds. "What?" he gasped at last. Scott looked at him with earnest, patient eyes. "I asked," Scott spoke more slowly and clearly, "how do you make love, and is it really very painful?" Lancer swallowed a couple of times, trying to jump start his brain and failing. Well, at least his heart was beating again after a few errant leaps, so he concentrated on breathing. Scott's unflinching blue gaze was making him uncomfortable. "What..." Right, so his voice was back, even if it sounded jittery. "What which I mean, what makes you ask such a thing?" "I watched that video and it was really confusing." Scott's brow furrowed. "I have heard 'love' many times on the other videos that you called 'soaps', and I have thought it is like a name for a person. You know, the way they call somebody 'love'. Or sometimes they say 'I love you' and you explained that it means the same as liking somebody very much. But on that video they spoke about 'making love' and " "Scott." Usually Lancer made a point of not interrupting Scott, but this was too important. "Scott what video? Which one was it?" "It was called 'Blue Night Falls'." "What?!" Lancer jumped to his feet and snatched the remote from the table, completely oblivious to the fact that he momentarily violated Scott's safety zone by about 90 percent. He sank back on the bed and pressed the button, hoping against all hope that Scott was mistaken. Though of course that was impossible. Scott was a Union clone, captured some months ago and since then strictly confined to his room in the Robillard base. He couldn't possibly know the name of a relatively new film that professed to be a romance but more truthfully represented a genre discreetly labeled as 'erotica'? Or, even if he'd somehow heard the name, how could he know what happened in it, unless he'd actually seen it? "Oh shit shit shit..." Lancer scanned through the list of titles, stopped, closed his eyes and counted to ten. Then he opened them again. It was still there: 'Blue Night Falls'. It stood out among the innocent educational titles like a sore thumb. How in heaven and hell had he managed to include it in the list? A mistake, plain and simple. Too quick a finger. An accident. But whatever it was, it was there and Scott had seen it. "I watched it several times " Lancer moaned and buried his head in arms. " but I could not understand it, and it made me feel very strange... Lancer? Are you not feeling well?" He lifted his face and peered desperately at Scott who was looking at him with genuine concern. Damn, this was not the time to start acting silly. He'd made a mistake, he had to deal with the consequences. This was Scott, who didn't know enough to understand his behavior right now. Lancer tried to ignore the heat in his cheeks and forced a smile on his face. "I'm okay, Scott. It's just that... you asked me a very difficult question. And besides, that film... I'm afraid I gave it to you purely by accident. It's eh understanding it requires knowledge of quite a few things that you haven't ever experienced." "Then please explain." Lancer took a shuddering breath and wrapped arms around himself. He knew Scott well enough to know there was no way out of this, all he could do was comply with the request. "Okay. Well. Love is, firstly, it's a feeling. It means the same as liking someone, or something, very much. But there are different kinds of love, and people also tend to use the word very vaguely to mean a lot of things." Scott nodded, listening attentively. Lancer relaxed a little. "So, it's a very strong feeling. There's love between parents and their children, like you've no doubt understood from the soaps and dramas. There's love between good friends, too. And then of course there's the casual usage that I'm sure you've heard, when people say that they 'love ice-cream' or 'love their new coat', meaning they like them very much." "But how can you make love?" "I was just about to come to that!" Lancer had been hoping that he could skirt around the hot topic for a good while longer, but apparently, no such luck. Well, just plunge in and hope to surface in one piece. "You see, then there's the special kind of love between people who oh boy the kind of love that binds two people together. They want to live together, be with each other all the time, do things together. And that includes making love. Or having sex, that's another name for it." Lancer blinked. He wasn't going to tell Scott what other names he knew for the act. What kind of language did 'Blue Night Falls' actually contain? He couldn't remember of course he'd seen it, who hadn't? but he was willing to bet it would be from milder end of the scale. "I still do not understand." Scott looked thoughtful. "If they like each other, then why do they want to cause pain to each other? On the film it both looked and sounded like it was very painful. And yet they did not try to fight each other, at least I think so, even though at times it almost looked like it." Lancer winced. "It's not painful," he said and swallowed thickly. "It feels very good. It gives sensations of extreme pleasure and satisfaction. And that's just it... it feels so very good that it's almost painful." He closed his eyes, unable to go on for a while, and hugged his knees tightly against his chest. He had talked as neutrally and analytically as he could, in an effort to keep those unwanted images and memories at bay, but now they wallowed over him. He could almost feel a hand playing with his tresses, hot breath tickling the back of his neck. Lancer, you promised to explain 'tickle'. He shivered. Experienced hands trailed down his sides, caressed his thighs, deftly avoiding the one place where he was dying to be touched. Elfkin, I love you. Don't make a mess of yourself in front of Scott, for goodness' sake, he needs to be told the facts, he's waiting for an explanation and you're behaving like an idiot. Oh god Turner harder please yes harder. Just tell him the facts and try to explain it in a way that he might understand. Lancer jerked his head up and tried to smile through his hair to Scott who was staring at him, looking very confused. "I'm sorry, Scott... I'm behaving silly." "You are crying, Lancer." Scott's voice was quiet, questioning. His hand rose slowly and for a while it hovered uncertainly. Then, very timidly, he touched Lancer's cheek. Lancer forgot to breathe when the narrow fingers swept off a tear that had rolled down unbeknownst to him. Scott was still sitting on the bed, legs crossed, but he had bent closer and was peering into Lancer's eyes under slightly crumpled dark eyebrows. "Do not cry, Lancer. It makes me feel an odd sort of pain..." His hand clenched into the front of his thin jacket. "Here. I feel pain somewhere here. Am I sad, Lancer?" "I think you are." Lancer forced the tears back but his voice was thick. "You see that I am sad, and it makes you sad, too. That's called compassion, Scott." "I have heard that word," Scott nodded. "I like you, Lancer. You are my friend. And it makes me sad to see you sad." He pondered for a while and then nodded again. "Yes. I used all those words correctly. I mean the things I said." Lancer couldn't help smiling at the analysis. "But I would like to understand why you are sad," Scott continued. "When you tell me about love, and making love or having sex, is that correct? why does it make you sad? If it is such a pleasurable thing as you say?" "Because..." Lancer began, and this time he knew that tears welled in his eyes but hecouldn't do a thing about them. He cleared his throat. "Because there was this man who loved me, and I loved him, and he died. It's a while ago already, but sometimes I still miss him so much that it hurts." His voice cracked and he wiped his eyes, almost angry with himself. He hadn't thought about Turner in this way for quite a while. He was getting over it, so why this outburst now? To Scott, moreover? To Scott, who was wait a minute sitting much closer to him than he had been, and who had tears in his eyes. Tears? Scott? Scott looked at him, narrowed his eyes, then frowned and his lips drew to a pout. For a while he stared at Lancer, then huffed and drew himself backwards. He looked displeased. "What is it, Scott? Is something wrong?" "I do not know." Scott looked even more displeased. "I feel very strange." "In what way? Try to explain, please." "It is difficult. When you say that you love this man, I feel strange. I feel that I do not like him at all, even though I have never met him. And I am glad he is not here anymore, although I know it is very bad of me to say so because you feel sad and miss him. But still I am glad he is not here, because I would not like him at all. If he was here, you would be with him, and you would not come to me, perhaps not at all, or not as often as you do. But I also feel angry because he is dead, because it makes you feel so bad." Scott thought about this for a while, then frowned even more. "I have a feeling I am not making sense now." "Feelings are often like that. Confusing. You can feel several things at the same time, and every now and then those things are in conflict with each other." Lancer spoke softly. "From what you tell me, Scott, it sounds like you are jealous." "Jealous." Scott tasted the word in his mouth. "What does it mean, jealous?" "What you just told me you feel." Lancer's smile was wistful. "When you like someone very much, you might be jealous to anybody else that person likes or spends time with. Because you'd want him to be even that time with you." "Yes!" Scott nodded vigorously. "I am jealous to this man. But is it not very silly of me? I did not know you when he was still alive. How can I feel jealous to someone who is dead?" "I know, it does not make sense but as I said, that's how feelings often are." Lancer hugged his knees tighter and watched Scott, who was still sitting much closer to him than ever before. They sat there for a long time just looking at each, neither moving nor saying anything. Finally Scott spoke again in a hushed voice. "You are still sad. Is there anything I can do to make you feel less sad?" "I'll be all right, Scott." Lancer smiled to him through tears that dimmed his eyes, no matter how hard he tried to blink them away. "I'd just need a hug now, but don't worry, I'll " "A hug." Scott bent closer and slid his arms around Lancer. It was just a tremulous touch at first, but little by little the wiry arms relaxed and Scott pressed closer. Lancer didn't dare do anything, he hardly dared breathe. He just sat there and looked into Scott's face that was so close to his. At last, very carefully, he lifted his own arms and embraced Scott who didn't move away. Their bodies sidled together, chest to chest, and then, incredibly, Scott's smooth cheek shyly pressed against his. Lancer heard a soft sigh and closed his eyes. "This feels good, Lancer..." Scott spoke very quietly. "Mmm-hmm." Sadness seeped somewhere, Lancer didn't care where. This felt so good, the warmth, the barely discernible breeze of breath. The heartbeat against his own. Arms that tightened around him, the hand that played with the wisps of his hair. He nestled his head against the bend of the neck. A hand touched his cheek and lifted his face up. Lancer opened his eyes and looked into dark blue. Scott's lips were parted, his face beyond confused. "Lancer... I think I love you. And I want to know what a kiss is like. Please." Lancer nodded, completely out of breath, and touched his lips on Scott's. They were warm as he nibbled gently on them, tickled them with the tip of his tongue until he managed to coax hem to open. Scott's breath hitched when Lancer's tongue touched his, his arms tightened convulsively but he didn't pull away. No, he hugged Lancer voraciously closer and then he was kissing back, complete lack of skill more than balanced by genuine enthusiasm. Finally Lancer had to pull off a little to get some air. Gasping, he looked at Scott's flushed face. The dark hair was tousled, and he realized that somewhere along the way they'd ended up lying on the bed, Scott half on top of him. He smiled in answer to Scott's questioning gaze, then felt something akin to shock when it dawned upon him what exactly was grinding against his thigh. "I... want to make love to you, Lancer!" Scott's whisper was urgent and throaty, unlike anything he'd ever heard from the clone. Lancer nodded mutely. "Please teach me how." Lancer nodded again and managed to snake a hand between their bodies to undo the fastenings of their clothes. Once Scott understood what he was trying to do, he helped eagerly and it didn't take long until they were naked enough. Bodies pressed together, bare skin on bare skin, frantic hands grabbing, but Lancer was desperately biding his time. They had to have something, anything that could serve as lube! He could feel that Scott was definitely well enough equipped and more than ready for the act, but telling a young Union clone in the middle of his first ever sexual encounter to please be careful was bound to be useless. He wanted this, wanted it very badly, but he also didn't want to be hurt, nor did he want to have to explain the situation to Scott if that happened. His searching eyes stopped at the bathroom door, and somehow he managed to pry himself from the wiry arms for the precious few seconds that it took to dash in, scoop some lotion, and get back to the bed. Scott was trembling violently while Lancer hastily prepared them both, but he held himself in check at least he still heeded direct commands. Then Lancer rolled on his stomach and looked at Scott over his shoulder. "Come on top of me, Scott." Another direct command, and one so rewarding to obey... Lancer guided the tip of Scott's erection to the right place, then arched his back and pushed slowly up to welcome the intrusion. Sure it hurt but less than he'd feared, and Lancer moaned into the pillow in ecstasy. Scott froze. "Do I hurt you, Lancer?" he asked, breathless and yet so serious. Lancer shook his head. "No... please don't stop, Scott..." His voice was husky with need. "Just do what you feel like. I told you... it feels so good it almost hurts." Encouraged, Scott pushed deeper and hit just the right spot, and Lancer couldn't hold back a cry. He managed to pull Scott closer with one hand and grasp himself with the other, lifting his body up to meet the thrusts, panting and whining and generally not having any idea of what he said, that is, if he actually said anything at all, apart from Scott's name. Narrow fingers gripped his hips hard enough to bruise, and he laughed out loud. "Yes, Scott, yes yes harder..." The thin sweaty body convulsed on top of him and he let himself go, be swallowed by the glorious fireworks dancing before his eyes. Scott gulped air into his lungs for a good while before he became once more conscious of the situation and of the naked body pinned underneath him. He pushed himself up on strangely trembling arms and looked at Lancer who lay completely still, face hidden by the hair fanning on the pillow. His heart thumped. "Lancer, are you all right?" Lancer stirred, turned around as much as he could, and opened his eyes. He smiled. "Yes, Scott... I'm feeling absolutely wonderful. What about you?" "I feel very good." Scott's voice was full of wonder. "Physically it was more enjoyable than I could have ever imagined anything to be. And I also feel so many emotions..." His voice trailed off, he lowered his head on Lancer's shoulder and pulled out. Lancer winced, then wiggled around and embraced him, trying to tug the blanket over them. Their sweaty bodies were cooling rapidly and he felt a bit chilly. Scott snuggled closer and giggled. Giggled. "I do not feel like talking right now." Lancer kissed him softly. "Let's not talk. You needn't tell me how you feel. I think I know... well enough. And I feel so good now." "I'm sleepy," Scott murmured and yawned. "Is this supposed to happen after making love?" "Yeah. It's very strenuous activity. And now we're so relaxed that it's easy to... fall asleep... Scott?" There was no reply. Lancer tried to see the face pressed against his shoulder. Scott's eyes were closed and his breathing was already slowing to a steady rhythm. One lean arm was slung over Lancer's waist, over the stickiness there. Ah well, shower would have to wait until the morning, he simply couldn't force himself up, not now when Scott was so comfortably cuddled next to him. Lancer's eyes opened very large Scott. Cuddled. Next to him. After they had just had sex together. Him and Scott, the Union clone. With whom he hadn't as much as touched hands since his arrival before this day.Yet here he was, naked, asleep, their bodies pressed together. Scott the Union clone, to whom he'd accidentally released a soft porn film. Had that been what Rori called 'trigger stimuli'? He'd have to ask that... in the morning. Right now he was far too comfortable and sated to engage in anything that might require higher intellectual input. Lancer drifted to sleep, not heeding the tiny, nagging voice in the back of his mind that suggested he might've forgotten something important.
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