Sweat was trickling into his eyes, drip drip drip, but he ignored the sting and concentrated on breathing deeply and evenly. Five more. Four. Three. Two. The last one. Oh no, tricked you, another five still, four, three – damnit, he could go on still – two, one, and again from the beginning –

"Don't overdo it."

Arria started and carefully released his hold of the handles. His arms were trembling, hell, his entire upper body was trembling, not to mention how every muscle in his legs and buttocks was still screaming from the routine they'd been put through before he'd crawled to his current contraption. He was about to wipe his face with a hand but noticed that sweat was practically dripping from his fingertips, and grabbed his discarded T-shirt instead. It was at least marginally dryer.

Orwel settled on the bench next to Arria and looked at him silently for a while.

"You know, Arria," he said conversationally, "before they left, Osip made me promise something. Can you guess what it was?"

"I think I'm going to hear it soon enough," Arria grunted, closing his eyes as he rubbed his hair with the T-shirt.

"He made me promise that I'd look after you, Supreme Commander. By now I definitely know why."

Arria shot him a testy glance from under those strangely dark eyebrows. "Oh? I'm not able to look after myself, is that it?"

Orwel smiled a little.

"I know you're fully able to do that," he said. "No, Osip was mainly worried because you tend to forget about the more mundane things, even during perfectly normal days. Not to speak about times like this, when you're specifically trying to distract yourself from the fact that something's missing."

Arria let his arms fall between his knees. Something clenched painfully right under his heart.

"I know you're working out so that you'd be tired enough to just fall to bed and sleep," Orwel continued matter-of-factly. "I guess it's working, but I seriously think you ought to relax in some other ways, too. And I'm not saying this just because your muscle tone is already enough to make me turn green with envy."

"Suggestions?" Arria asked dully.

"In fact, yes. How about sitting down and having dinner with me and Blaine?" Orwel cocked his head. "Just so that I'd see you actually eat something for once."

Arria considered the suggestion for a while. To his surprise it actually began to sound good. Not that he were particularly hungry, he never was after workout, but to just sit down with the guys, nibble on something, not be alone... He nodded.

"We'll be waiting for you in the canteen," Orwel said and stood up from his bench.

Arria lingered under the shower, letting hot water pour down along his aching body. He raised his face, eyes closing in the spray, rubbed his scalp with shaky fingers and let the heat melt away some of the weariness. By the time he stepped out and grabbed a towel from the rack, his skin was tingling pleasantly and he sighed, purposely not looking into the dressing mirror while he dried himself. He knew what he'd see: his own pale form where the outlines of muscles had of late begun to appear in sharp relief, and behind it the ghost of a darker, bulkier body pressing against him in a heated embrace that was only imagined, not real.

He pulled on his underwear, let a finger trace the slight bulge in the front, then snatched his trousers from the closet and shimmied into them with a frown. How was it possible to miss someone this much? So much that he kept feeling those playful, ghostly fingers on his own while zipping the pants, feeling them creep on his shoulders as if to prevent him from shrugging the jacket on, touching his neck under the low stand-up collar.

Arria shivered, wondering once more how the hell it all had actually happened. How was it possible that he was now standing here, missing his fabulous lover and fretting over the day-to-day running of a sizable military establishment, as its Supreme Commander? Considering his early, peaceful life, it would've been ironic if it hadn't been so chillingly real. He let his fingers rake through rapidly drying hair and wondered briefly whether knowing this in advance would've affected his decision to quit his challenging job at Trelissac Spaceport and join the rebellion? At least it would've made him waver much more – as if forgoing all his deep-rooted pacifist leanings and getting involved in armed rebellion hadn't already been tough enough.

Arria shook his head to his reflection and turned to go. No use pondering it now. He'd made his choice and there was no going back. He was used to responsibility, and even if the weight on his shoulders was now way beyond anything he could've ever imagined, it was there and he just had to bear it as well as he could. If only he didn't miss the comfortable closeness of his fellow Commander quite so badly...

Not that he was bearing it all alone, he reminded himself as he stepped into the pleasantly dimly lit canteen. A smile crept on his lips when his searching gaze spotted the dark head of his Base Commander to his right. Orwel noticed him and lifted a hand, and Arria nodded to him. When he approached the table, he saw the familiar sandy-brown hair and moustache of Dean Blaine, and raised an eyebrow when his eyes fell on a third person.

Juri was sitting there as well, slanted eyes laughing, and perked up immediately when he noticed Arria slip to the free seat.

"There you are," Orwel said. "I hope you don't mind that we invited Juri to sit down with us."

"Would I mind some more good company?" Arria shook his head. "Honestly, Orwel, sometimes you're being just too polite!"

"Well, should I then drop politeness altogether and tell you that you ought to be spanked, Commander, for being so reclusive nowadays?" Orwel retorted, eyes glinting. "All work and no relaxation is not good for you. There, that was all of the lecture you're going to get today! Now sit back, dine with us, and let's talk about something else than work."

"All right, I'll try to follow doctor's orders," Arria smiled. "So, Juri, were you in town today?"

Orwel threw his hands up. "What did I just say, Arria? You're hopeless!"

"This is not work," Arria insisted. "I'm making conversation!"

Juri laughed. "Yeah, I was there, and boy did we have fun again! It's getting more hectic now, as the kids've heard about all the things the others have done. Now they actually have requests about things they want to do, so we spend the trip there making plans for the day and then try to go through with them."

Arria smiled at his enthusiastic expression.

"You obviously like it," he said. Juri nodded vigorously, black curls bobbing on his forehead.

"I love it," he said. "Actually I think I'm going to be jealous to Dean here, once we finally get the timetables worked out so that he can take some groups, too."

"Well, that'll still be a while," Blaine said with a shrug. "Too much to do over here, and besides, I'm not that familiar with the city myself."

"Hey, do you think I was when going there for the first time?" Juri grinned. "I was as much a tourist as any of the kids! The only advantage I had over them was my experience of traveling. I'm still only learning the place, myself."

"And loving every moment," Orwel nodded. "I wish Lancer could be persuaded to go, too, but he simply won't budge. After all, he's lived in Trelissac."

"No use pushing him," Arria said. "But did someone mention dinner earlier? How about getting some over here and then continuing this non-work-related talk?"

"Sounds like a plan," Blaine chuckled and stood up. "After you, Commanders!"

They made a trip to the serving racks and soon returned to their table, trays loaded with a variety of deliciously smelling dishes. Arria looked down at his own collection in mild surprise. He was actually beginning to feel hungry, which was odd – usually even the thought of eating something so soon after workout made him nauseous. Maybe this, relaxed company, was what he needed, or maybe the hot vegetables just happened to be absolutely, divinely, mouth-wateringly, exceptionally delicious today?

"Talking about Trelissac," Orwel said after swallowing his first mouthful, "I've been bombarded recently. My darling kids are asking when it'd be their turn to get there."

"Well, no reason to place them last in line simply because their daddy happens to be the Base Commander," Juri reasoned. "I might include them in the next batch."

"It's just that I want to go with them," Orwel said. "We'll have to look at the days and pick one when I could come along."

"You're welcome to join in!" Juri smiled while Blaine rolled his eyes with an exaggerated sigh.

"Really, Orwel, don't you think Juri is competent enough to look after your handful of fleas?" he asked. Orwel opened his mouth so say something but Juri beat him to it.

"Dean, get real!" he chided. "We're talking about a single father here. Of course he'd want to be there when his kids get to experience something so exciting! Right, Orwel?"

"Damn right," Orwel nodded. "They're my kids, and these trips to Trelissac are part of teaching them about everyday life. It wouldn't feel right to leave all the fun to their teacher."

"As I said." Juri shook his fork to Blaine. "Single father. Wanting to take responsibility. Deal with it, man."

"I get the point," Blaine nodded and dug again into his food. "Will it be just the three of them, then?"

"If you want to go alone with them, Orwel, I'm not asking you to take any others," Juri said. "But if you want to come with me, then it's going to be them plus one MC and one TC. No special treatment."

"I'd prefer going with you," Orwel said. "And I think it'd be good for them to have some others along."

"But don't you think the TCs get more than their fair share of the trips?" Arria asked. "After all, there's just the five of them, versus all the others. Aren't they on their second or third rounds already?"

"Sure they are, but somehow it seems they need it more," Juri explained. "They're such a tight-knit group otherwise. Besides, they haven't been included every time, but their presence makes it that more interesting."

"How?" Blaine asked with interest. Juri thought about it for a moment.

"If there are only MCs and SCs, the group is much more straightforward," he said at length. "Easier to deal with, granted. But when there's a TC included, things get exciting. As a group, they're much less predictable, more prone to get off on a tangent. It seems to me that the TC is the observer who gets sudden ideas, then the SCs are sparked by it and suggest they simply go for it, and the MC grounds it all. It's damn interesting."

"Sounds exciting all right," Arria smiled. "So you enjoy your charges getting off on a tangent... if I'd ever had doubts about your suitability for this kind of thing, which I certainly never did, now I'd definitely be convinced."

"Used to think I'd be a teacher, you know," Juri grinned. "Maybe I'd have been suited for the profession after all."

"A great teacher you'd make," Orwel teased. "I'm sure that your students would love you. You know, the super nice teacher who needs just a little push to be carried away. Get him started on something totally unrelated, and the rest of the lesson will be one big trip!"

Juri managed to swallow his mouthful before bursting into laughter.

"Yeah, that's probably pretty close. My students would learn an awful lot, but I don't know how well their learning would be in keeping with the official curriculum."

"I'm not sure that'd be such a bad thing," Blaine remarked. "After all, you never know what exactly will be useful later in life. Even the most unexpected things may come in handy."

"You sound like you had first-hand experience," Arria observed.

"Sure I do," Blaine nodded. "During one term I chose several optional courses simply because there was this girl I was trying to impress. As things turned out, quite a lot that I picked up from those courses was extremely useful later on, even though I wasn't at all interested at the time."

"But you learned all that anyway?" Juri asked. Blaine tried to look contrite.

"Had to," he said. "She was a top student with certain requirements. Wouldn't even look at someone who didn't get good marks from the tests."

"So you got good marks, but did you get her?"

"Nope." Blaine shook his head. "She wasn't interested anyway, and then there was this other girl who proved much more fascinating than my initial flame..."

"Playboy," Orwel sighed. "I never stooped so low."

"You probably were the class nerd anyway!" Blaine shrugged. "Besides, unless most of the boys in your school were tall and darkly handsome, you most likely got anybody's attention easily enough, even without resorting to roundabout measures."

"I can't see why you should have trouble catching a person's eye!" Juri's gaze skimmed Blaine up and down, but the man just smirked.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I have to tell you I wasn't much of a looker back then," he said. "Mostly skin and bones. Lots of bones. The muscle that's between them nowadays is all a much later acquisition."

"Oh," Juri chuckled. "So academic excellence was your weapon of choice. Whereas I always trusted my glib tongue more. Funny how it never seemed to work too well in written tests, though."

Arria inhaled the relaxed atmosphere, feeling how the tight knot somewhere inside him loosened a little. Yes, the fleet was away and so was Osip, too far to remind him that he did everybody a disservice by not taking care of himself. He was needed, preferably sane and healthy. Staying sane and healthy took really rather little effort, eating and resting with some regularity being the most basic things. Burying his personal heartache in work was all very well, but burying himself completely was not.

Arria sipped from his glass, savored the very faint hint of alcohol, and sighed. Genuine weariness was slowly creeping upon him from the deepest recesses of consciousness where he'd kept pushing it, but this time he didn't battle it. He'd sit and relax here for a while, finish his meal, then go to bed. And sleep.

About an hour later, just as he was ready to call it a day, the air around the table was instantly electrified when several comms buzzed at the same moment. Arria, the first one to have his device in hand, gasped when he saw the code. It was from the Control Center, informing them of an incoming message –

"From the Zodiac system?"

Within seconds all four men were on their feet. Juri followed the three officers with his gaze, noticed the slim, uniformed figure of Sabina the Head Pilot slipping after them out of the door, and sighed. Absently he began to clear the table, pick up glasses and plates and stack them on an empty tray. At least we had time to finish our dinner and chill out for a while, he thought ruefully. That counts as a bonus. I just hope it's nothing too bad.

Arria's heart was pounding madly as he dashed into the Control Room, thoroughly startling the brown-haired man who'd been calmly scanning through the reports sent in by various monitoring stations positioned around the planet.

"What is it?" he demanded tersely. "The message?"

"Good lord, Commander, you gave me a fright!" The controller on duty slumped back into the chair from which he'd sprung on his feet. "It just arrived, it wasn't labeled urgent, so –"

Arria's shoulders sagged in relief and Orwel sighed deep behind him.

"What is it?" Sabina dove into the room between Blaine and the doorframe, training bright blue eyes at Arria. "A message from Pilot Commander?"

"Yes. Let's see it," Arria said quietly. "Please play it, Eric."

"Yes, Sir."

Everybody was trying to swallow their emotions as Osip's dark, confident face appeared on the screen and greeted them. The message was relatively short and to the point. The mission was going well, but their presence would still be needed for some time. So far they'd been lucky enough to suffer no casualties, oh, and cooperation between them and the Wolves was working well (which statement was accompanied by a little wink). Quenty Oyston was very impressed by the fleet's performance as a whole, and by the S-clone pilots in particular, said Osip, shamelessly beaming with pride. The mothership wasn't a bad place, but everyone was looking forward to being home again. And a number of private messages to various people were included.

"I'll decode and forward the separate messages now, sir," Eric said when he finally managed to tear his eyes from the video message and turned back to the desk.

"Good to hear from them," Orwel said in a subdued voice. Arria nodded and got up.

"I'll retire now," he said. "Good night."

"I will go too." Sabina examined her comm and nodded. "Yes, messages from Wilson and Scott..."

Blaine and Orwel followed her out of the room and then drifted to a stop in the corridor. Orwel cocked his head as he noticed Blaine's distant frown and wandering gaze.

"What is it, Dean?"

"Uh... nothing." The blond man shook himself and grinned sheepishly. "Just me being tired, I guess."

"I think I know you better than to believe that you're zoning out for no reason," Orwel retorted. "Something's the matter, and I'd like to know what."

Blaine's face darkened slightly. "Nothing to worry about, Commander."

"Since when do you 'Commander' me, Dean?" Orwel inquired sharply.

"Since you pull the Commander act," Blaine said, straightening his back. "Sorry, Orwel, but it's something I'd rather not discuss, not even with you."

Orwel's eyes widened and for a while he just stared at his friend who refused to meet his gaze. Finally Blaine sighed deep and shook his head.

"Damn, I should know you better. When you think you're on to something, you just won't let go... so, all right. I slipped, I pay for it. I like Sabina, a lot. A little too much. But since there's nothing I can do about it except wait that it passes, I ask you to just forget about it. Trust me, I'm professional enough not to act upon it."

"What does 'professional' have to do with it?" Orwel asked, now genuinely curious. "All right, you're still an SC trainer, but she's not your average SC any more. She's the Head Pilot now. Or do you still think of the clones as –"

"Orwel, you haven't had the time to think about this, but I have!" Blaine folded his arms on his chest, eyes flaring. "You won't catch me thinking about the clones as anything less than humans, worthy and capable of a real life. I know she's a fellow officer now, not my subordinate, so basically there'd be nothing to stop me. But the fact is, she's not your average fellow officer. She's still an S-clone, with an S-clone's background. I admit to being more than a little in love with her, shocked as I was to realize it myself, but how do you think it'd affect her if I started making moves? I've no idea, and I don't want to start finding out now of all times. We're understaffed, we need everybody performing at their peak. She has no experience of closer relationships, and she doesn't have anybody here to help her out if – no, when – she has questions or needs to talk about it to somebody! If this had happened before the mission, when everything was relatively normal and her number one friend Wilson was still here, then believe me, I'd think a lot differently. Now she has this huge responsibility to deal with, she's doing a superb job with it, and I have no desire to possibly distract her."

He had to stop to catch his breath and Orwel, so far unable to get a word in edgewise, raised his hands in submission.

"I get it, Dean, I get it!" he said hurriedly. "Sorry for intruding!"

"Sorry for getting worked up," Blaine grunted. "I guess I'm a bit touchy."

"You seem to be," Orwel nodded. "But I understand your point."

"No offence taken." The blond man managed a smile. "I know, you're just being you, concerned for your friends' wellbeing and all that. And I really appreciate your concern, but I'll survive this. Some patience shouldn't harm me."

Orwel smiled as well. "I guess there's so much tension in the air that whenever I think somebody has a problem I might help with, I leap at the chance," he said. "Seeing as there are so many that I can't do anything about."

Blaine nodded, then shot him a sideways glance.

"Well, now that we're talking about matters of the heart," he said quizzically, "at least you're soon going to have a good chance to do something about your little problem."

Orwel frowned, uncomprehending. "Problem? What problem?"

"Juri."

"What do you mean?" Orwel's jaw dropped. "How and since when is Juri a problem?"

"Since you began to be attracted to him."

"Since what?" Orwel shifted uncomfortably. "I'm not gay!"

"Nor is Juri," Blaine pointed out. "As I recall, he's made no secret about being bisexual. Ever heard the word?"

Orwel rolled his eyes, feeling an inexplicable heat in his face. "Of course. But I can't understand why you say something like that! He's a friend, just like you are."

"Not quite," Blaine said. "Because, believe me, I'd remember it if you'd ever flirted with me!"

"I don't flirt with him! I'm not gay," Orwel repeated.

"Right, keep telling yourself that!" The blond man smirked. "Or is this where I say 'oops' and apologize for telling you something you haven't even realized yourself?"

Orwel shook his head in confusion. "I don't understand what you're talking about."

"Okay – oops. I tell you that my observational skills, which you've praised more than once, have led me to conclude that you're flirting with Juri Lombard. Not very blatantly, but anyway. Apparently you've been so subtle that you haven't even noticed it yourself! So, maybe I'd better shut up now and hope I've not caused any irretrievable damage by blurting it out."

Orwel took a deep breath. "What damage? You're simply wrong, that's all."

"All right. I'm wrong, and we'll drop this subject!" Blaine spread his arms. "By the way, when are you taking your kids to Trelissac?"

"As soon as I can arrange it," Orwel said. "Can't see any reason to put it off, especially as Juri agreed to it."

Blaine smiled slyly, then suddenly fell very serious.

"In fact you might have good reason to hurry with it," he said slowly. "Judging from what Osip had to tell us, by now the Union must have recognized the aircraft. They know where those planes come from, and they're bound to have understood that we're using their own S-clones against them."

Orwel squeezed his eyes shut. "Damn you, Dean, you're absolutely right. They can't possibly fail to make the connection."

"You, Base Commander, had better take your kids to town pretty quick," Blaine said slowly. "As long as you have the chance."

"Jainah is an independent planet," Orwel said. "Ziroshel Union wouldn't dare do anything here."

"Are you so sure?" The captain turned to go. "I wouldn't count on it. Wouldn't be the first time."